My wife often uses the acronym “PAL” indicating “Parents Always Lie”. Whether it is a parent, patient, or partner – the result of a lie is a breakdown in communication, healing, and/or trust.
Colossians 3:9 (ESV) — 9 Do not LIE to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices
LIES fall into three categories: pathological, protective, or defensive. The way you can tell a pathological liar from the other two categories is their lips are moving. Defensive liars don’t like conflict – and so tell “white lies”. Protective liars justify their behavior by believing they are protecting someone with the “half-truth”.
Ephesians 5:6 (ESV) — 6 Let no one DECEIVE you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.
DECEPTION is a little more dangerous. We can be deceived, and we can deceive. When you lie to deceive, you are causing a schism that may never be able to be repaired. This is like having a “secret affair”. How can trust ever exist after someone has deceived you? I will never forget Scott’s words on this topic: “Oh, what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive!” (Sir Walter Scott, 1808)
Proverbs 29:5 (ESV) — 5 A man who FLATTERS his neighbor spreads a net for his feet.
FLATTERY is the most dangerous lie of all. It can be described as a chocolate covered lemon drop. Sweet on the outside but oh so sour on the inside. It is often used by men trying to entrap a woman. The only hint you may find is that it is always everyone else’s fault.
Friend, can the devil be called your father (Jn.8:44)? Or is your integrity such that your word is your bond?
